middle

hello world.

there is something that really draws me to this hour of the night. it's as if the lower my body and mind fall into sleep and a subliminal state, it's when my soul and heart take over. and many time's i just ponder, and before i know it, it's time to get up


tonight especially i feel unmoved. no that's not the right word. i feel like im not moving enough. im not getting where i need to be as fast as i should be able to. im not doing as much as i should because im getting tired.

something along those lines


it's at this time when the lack of everything makes me look inward and realize how fragile everything underneath our skin is.



am i over-thinking? ranting? being too sensitive for society's norm for a guy?
or am i just being real to myself?




many times in my life, i meet people who just run. from one thing to another. from a mistake to the next. from one high to the one that follows.
from one thing that runs out, to another thing that will soon be the same.
running. evading. isnt that just another form of lying to yourself?
and at the end of the day, there's no running from yourself.
so why do they run?
where do they run to?


people who demand attention. who crave attention. live on attention.
who miss the line between attention and folly
who forget that attention's dark friend is gossip
who forget that attention soon enough commands them
and soon lose themselves to attention.
where they want it alone, and nothing else. from every person in every way.


people who put up masks, facades, images of themselves that they want people to see. and never realize that the only person they're lying to is themselves.
and when masks crumble, what is left?
do they realise that, that is the fate of every mask?
to crumble.



because nothing in this world that is not real, lasts.


am i being real about myself?
am i running?
am i demanding attention on this blog?
am i putting up masks?
am i the real deal?



realise.

real. i. see.


seeing what is real, and being what is real.


the concept of introspection.


we claim we're all deep. none of us seem to be shallow.
can we look into ourselves and see beyond the surface? or is the surface all that makes us?

when we look beyond the surface, can we accept what we are? or do we swim back up because things are better on top?



is that deep?



being real. deep.





im glad that there are people in my life that keep me real. that tell me things i need to hear. not the things that i want to.

that keep me on track. onto improving myself, and not degrading.

people who keep me real about situations even when i dont want to see it.




real diamonds have withstood immense, no, tremendous, devastating pressure and heat.
fake ones are just there to look pretty, and crumble when the tension comes.

is that how we should measure the "reality" of ourselves?


do we crumble when we hit the road?




gnite world.

ming out